im a loser baby

am i a loser? i feel like i am....i feel like im really lame and i just stay home doing nothing. i know that's not true. i go out with people sometimes, when i can, and im not working, and i just had my girls here this weekend. and yet my mom makes me feel like such a loser. she tells me how i need to go out and socialize...just because im tired and i didnt want to go to kellys and drink...sorry but thats not really my idea of fun when i have to work at 7am. and this whole brad thing is killing me. i am so fucking lonely. i just...i just want someone to hang out with, someone to be with, someone to just relax with and go out with and be happy with. my heart is so broken by this brad thing and i want to just be happy ya know? i am afraid that im going to be alone. im afraid im never going to be happy...im afraid that i will be a loser forever.