I hate this...i hate sitting here waiting for my phone to go off, wondering if he is even thinking about me. All the while, feeling guilty because he is going through a hard time with the loss of the uncle that no one liked...although when people die that kinda changes now doesnt it?
How am i supposed to be helpful and comforting when all I can do is think about how this weekend, instead of being together and having a great time, he might not even be coming out anymore because we dont know when the wake/funeral are, and i might be attending one or both over the weekend. so much for it being a mini vacation eh?
and i dont want to text him because i texted him an hour ago saying i missed him and ive gotten nothing back...so i dont want to bother him. it's just there's only 4 days left...4 days before what was going to be an awesome weekend...and now i dont know what's going to happen. i feel so helpless and yet so selfish
and this is my only outlet...idk what to do, idk what else to do...fuck
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